What could be more fun than puns? Here are three clever plays on words to make your brain smile this summer:
Driving her crazy
Ernie Slattery was an incompetent cabbie, but he had a lot of charm. Occasionally a passenger would arrive in Glen Ellyn instead of Glenwood, but listening to Ernie’s delightful chatter made the roundabout ride a pleasure. No matter how off-track Ernie was, he could make any fare smile.
Well, almost any fare. One afternoon as a new customer was getting into Ernie’s cab, a disgruntled woman grabbed his arm and suggested he hire a different cabbie. “I’m a former passenger of Ernie’s,” she said, “and let me tell you, Slattery will get you nowhere!”
Dog days
For some reason, the dog population in Munich, Germany, was exploding. Over the course of several months, the number of dogs doubled, then tripled. A special Commission for Dog Control was appointed, but the problem went unabated. Masses of dogs roamed Munich’s streets and streamed into shops and businesses. One day, the Head Commissioner received a call from the owner of a factory. “You’ve got to send help,” the caller said, “The mills are alive with the hounds of Munich!”
This rings true
Donna was a new realtor with a very successful real estate office. Her first day at the office, she was organizing her desk, introducing herself to her new co-workers, and trying to get oriented to the company culture. Throughout the day, she kept hearing bells—some were as loud as a gong, and others were little tinkly notes. Finally Donna asked one of her co-workers about the bells. “That’s the signal we use to let each other know how sales are going,” the co-worker explained. “Big bongs mean a house was sold; little tings mean a lot.”
Thank you! Thank you! I’m here all week!
That reminds me of the drunk optometrist that fell into his lens grinder. He made a spectacle of himself.
Good one, Jim. In fact, I’d call it spec-tacular!